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Going With The Flow

Today my own plans would have had me having lunch in Seattle at the restaurant, The Redmond Grill where my son is the Chef. I am scheduled to give the ceremony for my granddaughter’s wedding tomorrow. It is to be a blessed day! But, due to the snow storm Seattle has experienced, here I am in sunny San Diego with a day open to other choices. The last twenty-four hours have been interesting as I stepped out of my life and looked at what was going on around me.

We live in a culture where we are encouraged to be in control of what is happening and especially with own life. But sometimes, nature and the Universe seem to have something else up its sleeve. So do we freak out or learn to go with the flow and do the best we can?

As a personal life coach one of my major lessons in my life has been to , “let go of those things you have no control over and go with the flow”. I am three quarters Irish and as a young woman had a very short string when it came to patience. Now as an older and wiser woman with tons of experience under her belt, I have many more choices which allow me to stay calm, centered, and go with whatever is happening in my world. I live in more trust and I have learned how to manage my energy better. Being with a man who also keeps a very calm and cool head has also been a great benefit. It has led to much less stress and less adrenaline rushes which is ten times better for health and happiness. I appreciate this about him.

One of the most important books I have read is FLOW, by Mihaly Csiksezentmihalvi

. There are many corporations that are teaching these principles today to their leadership teams. It is early day positive psychology and has been incorporated since into a wide variety of fields. Flow is a mental state and once you know how to tap into it for work, motivation and harnessing emotions for single-minded immersion to your tasks at hand, it can become your second nature for whatever it coming your way. People have asked me how I stay so upbeat and happy and I think FLOW is part of the answer. I believe that Flow is our original and true nature. I also believe we can learn to be more optimistic and not to let disappointments and changes in plans throw us over the edge into drama and crisis. We can go inward to our heart center and spirit and know that it is all working out for the very best. And book tickets for a later flight affirming that the snow will melt and it will rain and clean everything up so the roads are open.

Whenever you have a challenge, don’t lose your cool. Ask yourself, how can I step into it and find a positive solution. Are there other any out-of-the box possibilities? I think challenges come up for us to see if we can solve them creatively and produce better answers. I ask myself “what would a genius do in this situation”? What would Leonardo da Vinci do? What would my grandfather do? Who do you really admire and think is super smart? Who do you think is amazingly creative? Who is practical? Sometimes you have to step back and let it work itself out and sometimes you have to just let it go after checking out the alternatives and be at peace with it.

Hopefully, tomorrow I will be speaking the words we designed and marry my wonderful granddaughter and her Fiancé and celebrate their great day. Stay tuned and watch for the posting of pictures on Facebook.

Kathy Nelson is a Personal Life Coach in San Diego, California

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